Untitled II

A ewe is a ewe.
And a ram is a ram.
That’s how I want to live.
I want to be who I am.

But why must I live
In a forced sham?
Why must I be a ewe
with the horns of a ram?

Based on the song by the famous Dutch artist Toon Hermans ‘Een Eik is een Eik en een Den is een Den’ (an oak is an oak and a pine is a pine). The entire second half is mine, though.


Who am I?

I cried as I wrote this…

I am tired, yet wide awake.
I am a child of the night, yet I live day by day. 

I am both… and I am neither.

I am kindness and love, I am fury and hate.
Nothing is dearer to me than those close to my heart,
but even they beware when my anger rules my thoughs.

Who am I?

They say I can write, and so I like to believe,
yet I do not speak unless spoken to

I am courage and bravery,
overcoming my bounds when I feel I must.
I am  cowardice, frightenedness and uncertainty.
I fear tomorrow, for it may be another today.

Who am I?

I am he who is she, I am she who is he.
Locked up deep inside of that which I loathe.
The world does not accept that which rages within,
but if it is not real, why does it burn so  much?
does  it hurt so much?

Why can I not be who I am?
How is who I am so hard to accept?
But who am I to change the worlds of others?
Who AM I?

I am loneliness, facing my problems alone… 
She who understands does not want me
-cannot want me-
however hard she tries.
And I do not blame her
-cannot blame her-
for I love her with all my raging heart.

And who would love one that does not know who they are? 

My Shadow


and all shall fade, and all shall die
and nothing shall withstand
the coming storm, the coming night
nothing shall hold ground
As for me, I will live on
and walk my world alone
in solitude, in misery
my life will be my own.
and I’ll know joy, and I’ll know peace
and I will be content
nevermore, with these ebony
ravens at my side
And all shall live, and all shall stay
to me all is the same
I’m still alone, I am still dead
Will time only tell?

I am my own life’s companion.